Comedian Robert Kelly from talks MMA
Stand up comic Robert Kelly, whose credits include being a part of Dane Cook’s “Tourgasm” tour, having a special on Comedy Central Presents, and appearances on the popular Opie & Anthony radio show; also happens to be a huge MMA fan.
Bob was nice enough to take time out of his schedule to chat with The MMA Digest.
How’d you get into MMA?
My good friend, comedian Patrice O’Neil, told about this video where guys beat the shit out of each other until there was one left. Some real highlander shit. And this little guy from Brazil beat everyone with magic. How could you not be interested in that shit?
This was before Youtube so you had to know somebody with the videotape to see it, it was like underage porn. I was hooked. On the UFC, not under aged porn.
I have to be honest my interest in UFC kind of dwindled after a while because the fights where few and far between. Finding a new UFC video at blockbuster was like finding a golden ticket. But it really picked up again when I saw TUF on Spike TV. It was amazing to me that it was on my TV and I could Tivo it and watch it over and over again. The days of UFC being so underground where over. Between the UFC and WEC on Versus my DVR is filled. My wife is pissed there is no room on the DVR for extreme home makeover or anything.
Have you or would you like to train?
I took Kempo Karate when I was around 17, 18. I think I got up to my yellow belt and then my girlfriend at the time joined the class with me. Soon after that we would just hit the all you can eat buffet across the street from the school. I was in class one night warming up and I had gotten so fat that my GI split like I was wearing tight Jordache jeans.
So I never went back. Do you know how hard it is to split a GI? I don’t know if I could train MMA now I’m 38 and have a hard time doing 40 minutes on a Elliptical Machines never mind rolling with some Brazilian guy who could rip my arm off and hit me with it. Who knows maybe someday?
What was the experience like being live at UFC 100?
UFC 100 was amazing. Not only the fights but also the weighin and fan expo…everything. There were fighters walking around the casino taking photos with fans and singing what ever was put in front of them, and not one of them was a dick. It was like they were enjoying it as much as the fans. Another thing is that the UFC doesn’t put shit on the there fight cards. Every fight was insane, from the under card fights to the two title fights. The energy in the arena makes you want to stand the whole time.
UFC 100 will go down as one of the coolest things I have ever done. If you have never gone to a live UFC event you need to make it happen.
Fuck the Super Bowl, fuck the World Series and the Stanley Cup, go to a live UFC event. Every other sport you have to wait to the end of the season to see the big show When you see a UFC fight live that’s it, your at the Super Bowl. These guys have trained for the last six months for this one night, and there is no team behind them helping them win. It’s just two men one octagon and a ref so they don’t kill each other in every fight.
What were your thoughts on Brock Lesnar’s post fight celebration which caused some controversy?
I think what Brock did was fucked up, but that’s why it was great. There are people who hate this guy now, and there are people who love what he did. As a comedian I thought it was fucking funny. As a fan of MMA and HUGE fucking fan of Frank Mir, I was pissed. We are so used to these guys having respect for each other and the art they practice. Lyoto Machida bowed to me when I met him for Christ sakes and I’m a nobody. Brock comes from a different background. When a wrestler looses a fight its all about them and what they did wrong not that the other guy beat him. When a martial arts guy looses he admits the other guy was better than him that night and says he has to go back and learn more and become better himself. All in all people are talking about it so that can’t be bad for the sport. I believe if everyone likes you, you’re doing something wrong. God hates natural people. You have to pick a side and Brock made people do that. Now people want to see someone make him eat some humble pie. I just don’t know if that someone is out there right now.
“I took that horseshoe and beat him with it.” Come on you have to laugh at that.
Who was the most interesting or most fun fighter you have met?
It has to be “Rampage” Jackson. I’m a comic and let me tell you this guy could do stand up comedy if he ever gave up fighting. Reed Harris, who is one of the coolest motherfuckers on the planet, knew me and (comedian) Jimmy Norton wanted photos with all the fighters so he just kept bringing guys over to our seats. So at one point I look up and there is “Rampage” is doing his staredown face in I my grill and he wouldn’t break it. I just bowed my head and started nervously giggle. It went on for over a minute to the point where I thought I might have done something wrong to him. Then the stooge slapped Jim and me in the face nd took a photo with me. You want to laugh? Youtube
tube him in Japan fucking with people in stores.
What’d you think of the extra shot that people have accused Dan Henderson of taking after knocking out Michael Bisping?
I don’t think Dan did anything wrong. He was in a fight with a guy who was talking trash for a long time. So when he got him with that big right he wanted to make sure he finished the fight. How the fuck is he supposed to know the guy is out? The second punch his whole body left the ground and came down on Bisping’s face, and then the ref stopped it, and so did Dan. It all went down in seconds, I have seen worse. Like Rampage versus Wanderlei Silva–Rampage knocked him out and kept punching his face over the shoulder of the ref. Hendo knocking out Bisping is one of the greatest knockouts I have ever seen.
Cain Velasquez and Shane Carwin will likely fight to see who gets a shot at Lesnar next. Who do you think wins that fight and how do you think they do against Lesnar?
I think Shane is going to win the fight against Cain. Or at least I hope he does because I think Shane has a better chance of beating Brock after seeing Brock control the hips of Frank Mir who is one of the best Jiu-Jitsu heavyweights of all time. And then he hammerfisted Frank’s face into the canvas. I just don’t know if anyone can beat this guy. Cain and Shane are big guys with a great wrestling background–that is key in being able to avoid Brock’s take down. But you need an iron skillet on the end of your fist to knock this guy out. And I think Shane has that big right hand. He was losing the fight with Gonzaga–he got taken down and got back up to his feet and then one punched Gonzaga to end the fight. Cain went to a decision with Cheick Kongo but hat’s not going to happen with Brock. I am really interested to see when Bobby Lashley makes his way up to the UFC, and then Fedor..holy shit heavyweight is starting to get me excited again. I think I just got a chubby.
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Visit Robert Kelly online at RobertKellyLive.com
http://www.robertkellylive.com
